I had a breakdown recently, and it was complete. Not only were my emotions and psyche devastated and ruined, but so was my body. Panic attacks, UTIs, hyperthyroidism, Entero infections, and Staph infections are no joke – especially when they all come at the same time. Why, hello, excessively weak immune system. I suppose you’ve come for the stress? Might as well make yourself comfortable. It won’t be going away any time soon.
My semester has officially ended, and I definitely haven’t finished it on a high note. I’m on my way to the next phase of this journey, and it looks like it includes even more humbling experiences, even more hard work, and even more soul-searching. Even after two years of living in this completely different place and being this completely different person, and having the opportunity to figure out just who I am and what I’m about and what it feels like to live in the skin I’m in, I still have no clue what any of the answers to those questions could be.
I’ve spent the last month or so flailing around, waiting for the tide to turn and this phase to be over.
Now I feel a new wave coming in and I’m bracing myself. There are lots of big decisions to be made and a lot more noise to cancel out. Every change seems bigger than the last, and the next one is bound to be epic.